Cobra; retreat, RETREAT!
As a child of the 80’s (83 to be exact) there are somethings that are stamped indelibly in my brain. Theme songs and cartoons like Thundercats, BraveStarr Ghostbusters and of course GI Joe. Well, lots of games have been coming out from 80’s properties some good, others bad and well sadly G.I. Joe: Wrath of Cobra falls on the bad side of things.
Mega-fans of the franchise might find some fun with this side-scrolling beat-em up but I am not even really sure about that. Wrath of Cobra is an extremely simple and basic game but its biggest sin I think is just how dull it is, which is crazy considering how bombastic the G.I. Joe franchise can be. It just feels criminal how underwhelming it is going from left and right beating up nameless Cobra goons, not only that but it really feels like once you have completed one stage you’ve seen everything the game has to offer.
MSRP: $24.99
Platforms: PC
Price I’d Pay: $9.99
G.I. Joe: Wrath of Cobra has four characters to choose from; Scarlett, Snake-Eyes, Roadblock and of course Duke. Doesn’t matter which character chooses they each have a basic standard attack and a heavy attack that can theoretically mixed together to make combos. I say this is only ‘in theory’ because combos only ever happened every so often. Each of the attacks just feel shallow and only transitions to combos if players hit the attack button fast enough. There are special attacks that players can perform when their power gauge is full but even these just ring hollow. Weapons can be picked up from the ground and all of the gun’s fire like blasters just like in the cartoon which was a nice shot of nostalgia.
Even the nostalgia isn’t enough to help this game out, the combat just feels so floaty. In a timeline where we have the fantastic TMNT Shredders Revenge, Streets of Rage 4 and more this G.I. Joe game just feels like it was slapped together to make use of the license. Which is a damn shame because this franchise hasn’t had a good video game since the NES version. Not even the boss fights help to liven this one up and feel just as boring as beating up nameless Cobra grunts. Which how do you mess up a fight with Cobra Commander in 2024?! I just don’t get it.
It isn’t all bad though, G.I. Joe Wrath of Cobra does boast some bright a colorful retro-style visuals as well as a decent soundtrack. Honestly if this game had the intro theme from the G.I. Joe animated movie back in 87, this would be the best soundtrack ever. If you have never heard that track, check it out on YT; it is extremely catchy. There is also some unlockable that players can chase by earning the in-game currency, there are a few characters, boss rush mode and the like. None of this makes the game better though.
As I said before, in the year of our Lord 2024 the fact that THIS is the G.I. Joe game that we get just feels bad. While G.I. Joe: Wrath of Cobra isnt a terrible game, its not a very fun one to interact with. From floaty combat to its subpar boss battles, I couldn’t help but think that this game was capable of so much more. Even with unlockable content to chase adding some replayability to the game, the real question is if gamers or even fans should bother playing this one at all.
Review copy of game provided by publisher.
