Love Bites
From the outset, Romancelvania seems like an interesting mashup, taking a dating sim filled with a cast of seemingly quirky and deep characters mashed together with a large gothic Transylvania and progress that is gated until players find a certain ability. With the surge in the ‘Metroidvania’ games here lately this one stands out simply due to its concept, but sadly that’s really the only thing it has going for it.
The plot in Romancelvania is a wild one, after their lover left them, Dracula (which can be chosen to be male or female) has been moping around his large castle for centuries. Well since he or she is best friends with Death, yeah, the Grim Reaper himself decides they have had enough and puts together a dating show for Drac to get his groove back. Just as happens in the Metroid games Drac is stripped of all his abilities by Death who tasks him to wonder around Transylvania to meet the cast of the show and his potential love interests.
MSRP: $24.99
Platforms: Xbox (reviewed), PlayStation, PC
Price I’d Pay: $19.99
The game is filled with some notable potential mates, there is a zombie pirate, the devil himself who always walks around with his junk hanging out and it is appropriately pixelated to hide it for rating reasons, and even the Van Helsings who appear as a trio of angelic nemesis for Dracula but only one can be chosen as a lover. All of the potential mates are pulled from the movie monsters of yore, and they all appear to have a lot going on but once you start talking with them some of them you realize that there really isn’t ‘more than meets the eye’ here. Some characters seem more fleshed out than others, this is especially true of the later characters. Due to the pacing of the game the last few lovers that are unlocked just aren’t as fully developed as say the big boobed pumpkin witch, PS Elle whom players meet early on.
There is combat in the game which sees players killing the usual suspects that one expects to find around in Dracula’s castle. That is to say skeletons and other horror enemies, the problem though is that there is no joy in defeating them. Controlling Dracula is a chore as he feels weightless, and it makes it difficult for platforming sections. The weapons aren’t very fun with the whip being about the best of the bad bunch and Dracula’s legendary abilities while useful for puzzles just feel tagged on. The biggest sin though is that enemies don’t react to getting hit, the only clue to know that the players strikes are true is seeing the foes health bar go down. They don’t stun, or flash or anything thing else that happens in games when one hits an enemy; it’s just very odd in this day and age.
Which brings me to the graphics, my time on this game was spent on the Xbox Series X. Romancelvania for some odd reason is locked to the current gen systems but there is absolutely nothing about this game that makes me think this was necessary. This game was created by a small team and thus the 3D graphics are passable, but seeing as this game that is a side-scroller will frequently have slow down issues I just don’t see what is ‘optimized’ for the current gen. This just seems like a missed opportunity for the already large install base of the PS4/Xbox One to experience a new indie game. Graphics aside I do appreciate the voice acting in Romancelvania, it helps with a lot of the naughty talk and double entendre especially when talking to the PS Elle.
I can see what this team was going for with this game, but sadly Romancelvania is a jack of all trades but master of none. If this was a straight up visual novel, I think the experience would have been richer, but with the lackluster combat, wonkiness of controlling Drac themselves and the last few contestants just feeling like they were thrown in the mix; I come away wishing for better for this game. It’s not a horrible game, but its not really a good one either, if you want to experience it for the laughs just know that it will come with the tears of having to deal with the combat.
Review copy of game provided by publisher.
